I called her on her behavior and now she says that because of my grandfather, who is my last living grandparent and a 93-year-old stern, depression-era man whom my mom and I don’t want to upset, that my girlfriend will not be allowed at any family event at her house as long as my grandfather is alive.
I talked it over with my girlfriend and she stated that she was willing to act as a friend as long as my grandfather was around because she understands and would have done the same for her own grandfather.
Going without her is not an option because I will not repeat my past misery.
I would visit my grandpa at other times to replace that time I don’t get with him at those events.
To not stand for something means not going along with it.